Experimental MTP

I have a bachelors degree in theatre, and I am a Christian.  There may have been a time where one might have considered it impossible for those two things to be true of one person.  Perhaps I am a walking contradiction.  Or, perhaps, in the words of Val Kilmer’s Doc Holliday, “my hypocrisy knows no bounds.” Continue reading “Experimental MTP”


Who are you attracting?

There’s a New Age guru following me on twitter.

When I discovered this, I actually laughed out loud. Not that his beliefs are funny to me; but simply, I didn’t see that one coming.  Somehow this person found me and decided that there was some kind of value or benefit even, in clicking the follow button on my profile. There’s a myriad of reasons he could have done this, many of which have nothing to do with who I am, or what I’ve been saying on the internet–so I’m not going to be so arrogant as to think that I am going to be the key to some profound things in his life via my excellent tweets. Continue reading “Who are you attracting?”

Hello from New York

Well, I’ve tried to do some video blogging just for fun, but as these things go, technical difficulties have arisen.  So, if you get to see the videos, it will likely be much after the fact.

Oh, well.

I can tell you that I have never been in a more humid environment before, and it takes some getting used to.  But that’s pretty much all I have to complain about, and that ain’t too bad. Continue reading “Hello from New York”

it’s not About Me, at least not entirely

I started this blog a couple of years ago because I would go to a Bible study, or read a book or a devotional, and have some kind of interesting thought or even a revelation about God, or faith, or living as a Christian. I would go home to my empty house and want to tell someone about it, but I lived alone.

Eventually the thought occurred to me to try to write those things out, and even to post them on a blog. But, I didn’t really tell anyone about it. And while you’re scratching your head, wondering how blogging to no one is different than talking to myself as I stand over the kitchen sink eating my dinner, I’ll tell you that it is pretty much the same. And really different.

Writing these things out helped me solidify what would have otherwise been fleeting ideas and revelations. I’ve learned from the process; and I think that is evident in the writing to anyone who’s daring enough to sift through this blog’s history.

The point never was to make myself out to be an authority on Christianity. I am neither a dead English apologist, nor a perky blond Texan. This is just me, trying to figure a thing or two out; which may or may not be helpful or interesting to those who happen to wander onto this site.   While I think some of my older posts may have a tone that comes off like I know something that you need to know too, that was never my attitude nor perspective.  Hopefully my tone is more genuine these days.

What you can expect to see from here on out is more of the things that I learn, the things I discover, and the things that interest or even excite me. The occasional video, or image should be expected.  You may even see that the posts become more and more broad, and more loosely related to one another.  That’s because I’m learning about God in a whole bunch of different ways, some of them more subtle than others.

What you can expect not to see here are posts about my knitting club, my love for cats or videos of my children.  Not that those things don’t make great blogs, but none of them are applicable to my life.  So you may or may not get to know me better.  But I don’t feel like that’s the point of this blog, anyway.  It’s why I never did the obligatory ‘About Me’ post, so common on blogger.

Cake or Death?

Today we were given an assignment in my theology and culture class; or rather, an existing assignment was altered.  Instead of journaling our thoughts about class, we are to do an act of kindness and then write about it.  I think I might stand on the corner and dance with a sign that says “Cake or Death?“.  We can call it the tract for the more visually stimulated emerging generation.

Well, it’s a start anyway. 

Or perhaps, I can find something to do that can have more impact than a tract; visual or otherwise.

Are you Lazy? (confession 4)

Man, sometimes I feel like the laziest person I know.

I live with two other women, and we’re all quite different from one another.  Both of my roommates put me to shame when it comes to focus.  They both always seem to be studying, or getting lots of other things done.  One of my roommates has commented on several occasions that since I’ve moved into the apartment, she feels like she’s been on a nearly non-stop vacation.  She means it as a complement, but I can’t help but feel the indictment in it too.

Let’s add to the equation, that the sermon series for the last few weeks at my church has been Fresh Start (it’s good stuff. listen to it here).  This series among other things, has been challenging us to recognize where we may’ve dropped the ball –perhaps in 2009– and encouraging us to get back on track in 2010.  Hey, there’s no shame in placing a sermon series at the top of the new year that hopefully capitalizes on our desire to start a new year off on the right foot.

All totaled. I feel like a lazy lump.  Over the last few months, my to do lists seem to be less and less crossed off.  I’ll even confess that I may have avoided making a list (literal or metaphorical) on a few occasions, just so I wouldn’t have to face it unfinished at the end of the day. 

But, I keep returning to God on this topic, and we’re working on some things together.

So, do you feel lazy? Are you doing anything about it?

An up and coming ministry you should know about

I returned yesterday afternoon from a beautiful retreat center nestled in the lovely village of Montecito. I found out about the retreat from the professor of one of my courses at Fuller, and signed up for various reasons, not knowing what to really expect. To my delight, however, the lovely leader, Kristen, came into our class the day before the retreat to briefly speak. She was a total kick in the pants, even a kindred spirit. It was for this and several other reasons that I was embarrassed and shocked when one of my peers in the class was so condescending to her. Here was an intelligent, articulate and studied woman trying to make a point, and when she paused to gather her thoughts, he raised his hand and offered “can I finish your thought?” and proceeded to tell her in essence, that she should have children because they are “healing” (see her blog where she recounts the incident with more detail). There are enough things wrong with what went down in that moment that I could rant out a whole other post that would probably not glorify God nor do anyone any good. So I’ll get back to my point.

Like I said, I wasn’t sure what exactly to expect at a retreat focusing on the issues involved in women’s sexuality and what we could really address in less than 48 hours together. I have been part of two or three Bible studies that attempted to address this topic, and often it took weeks before participants were willing to be honest about their self image, the things that had hurt them, or past experiences. I was surprised at the speed at which the leaders took our topic to the heart of the matter, rapidly creating an atmosphere of trust and even blunt honesty that I wish could happen just as quickly and gently at all women’s retreats. I was blown away at the number of women I could think of that I wished could have been there to participate. NOT because I could think of a list of women who were troubled, or needed fixing, but simply women who’d been hurt, or neglected, or believed a cruel word said to them. Women who still experience guilt or shame over some aspect of their body, appearance or femininity.

This retreat wasn’t a quick fix. In fact, I left holding onto permission from Christ that I am not some broken woman who needs to be sent off to be fixed–as if there is a one-stop-shop Jiffylube womanhood mechanic that can wipe my memory, lipo my belly, and do my hair and makeup in an afternoon. Sure, there’s some tender spots that Jesus and I can work on. Some grace I need to accept. This is something I think so many women need to recognize about themselves.

So, without further ado, I direct you to Kristen’s ministry: A Beautiful Mess. Please visit her site, wander around, read her fabulous blog, get your mind spinning.